Sunday 30 September 2012

Country Pursuits

I am possibly the least likely person to go on a day of country pursuits, being a very urban sort. But I was kindly invited out to a day of country pursuits in Oxfordshire which, compared to day in the office, seemed really rather appealing.

We were supposed to undertake 5 activities over the day. First up was fly-fishing. Now I have never undertaken any form of fishing, and lets just say I didn't take to this like a duck to water. I was truly awful. Never really mastered the technique of casting at all. To give you an idea of how bad I was, I did actually manage to hook my cap. But so bad was I at casting I didn't get the full comedy effect of whisking it off my head.

As done by the expert
Luckily others were rather better and did actually catch some trout. One of which I took home and had for dinner Saturday night. Was delicious. I think I will leave this fishing lark to the experts though. My instructor tried to reassure me by saying he was teaching his 7 year-old to cast. I suspect I was compared unfavourably.

Nice spot though.



Next to archery. At this I have to say I fared much much better. We started off aiming at a target and then went on to woodland (or at least wooden) animals. I happily got an arrow firmly in the middle of the boar, the deer and the crocodile(!), first time in each case. Happy with that. I may not be able to survive in the woods with a fishing rod, but maybe with a bow and arrow....



Thence to racing "rage buggies". Being a non-driver I was more than a little nervous about this one, but actually wasn't too bad. I think it would be pretty hard to crash or turnover one of these, but I didn't even come close. I didn't break any speed records though.


My first 50 years of experience hadn't encompassed sheep-shearing, so here was my opportunity to put that right. This was actually quite fun, and quite easy with the help of this Kiwi bloke holding it down for us. I managed this very easily - not a nick on the old ewe, let alone clipping off a leg as I feared.






Last was another sort of buggy, but the difference here was the total lack of steering wheel. You have a throttle either side of you and and steer by pushing one further than the other. The aim is to steer round a series of slalom poles. I thought my Olympic Games experience of watching white-water canoe slalom might help. It didn't. My practice attempt at this was truly woeful, but my real run was actually ok. Just a matter of picking up the technique. I didn't do wheelies though.



To finish off, a three-course meal in the barn conversion. This sort of corporate hospitality stuff is clearly a valuable addition to normal farming. It was certainly fun. As of course is sitting down to dinner and chatting to new people about everything from the Olympics to International fraud.

And, believe it or not, more fun than pensions law.

Bronze and the Gunners

It being a very wet Monday morning, I thought I would profitably use my day off going to the new Bronze exhibition at the Royal Academy. A decision that paid off royally.

This is a wonderful exhibition. And by getting there at opening time on a very unpleasant day, I had the place virtually to myself by the device of just getting three galleries ahead at the start, thereby getting away from my fellow early birds, before doubling back at the end to see the first galleries, now slightly more full.

Anyway, this is a superb exhibition, of the sort of sweeping scale the RA quite often does. As it has no permanent exhibits of its own (or very few anyway) it doesn't have the same temptation as the British Museum say, to call up most of the exhibits it has on display anyway, plus some unattracive stock from the vaults and add a few bits from around the world and make a whacking charge. At the RA you probably will never have seen some of the exhibits, and maybe never will again as they may come from pretty obscure places. This one had some bronzes from Sicily and a particularly stunning Hellenistic bust from Bulgaria that I am unlikely to see again.

The theme of the exhibition was, of course, bronze artifacts, and so rather than a group of exhibits from one time or place, they were grouped by subject matter, allowing a compare and contrast thing. The best were by far either the classical or the neo-classical, especially the statues or portrait busts. The few modern pieces just look rather dull and boring, and most of the African and Chinese a bit crude by comparison. But it was just wonderful.



Bronze parade helmet found in Cumbria realtively recently


Etruscan chimera


Beautiful releif in bronze by de Vries




Incredibly fine Thracian king's head in Bulgaria. Magnificent piece in perfect condition, right down to the coloured stones used for the eyae. You can't really see how to produce a finer bronze but, and this is 3rd century BC


Best of the Nigerian bronzes

Brancusi's Daniade

Picasso's baboon with baby
I went out into the rain thinking that I might just have lunch at a Lebanese restaurant in Shepherds Market, but I got sidetracked into fancying a curry so turned up like a drowned rat at the Mayfair Tandoori. Rubbish restaurant - probably wordst biriani I have ever had. Felt a bit deflated, and wet, leaving.

My Tuesday was just another day in the office, but Wednesday night was my first football match of the season. An obvious mismatch between my team, Coventry City, and Aresenal, in the League Cup. I had hoped the Gunners might put out an incredibly junior side, (I suppose Arsenal Ladies was too much to hope for!) but they were unsporting enought to lace the side with players of the calibre of Oxlade-Chamberlain, Walcott and Giroud. Actually Coventry held it all together quite well in the first half and were unlucky to go in a goal down, Arsenal having created very little. Unfortunately, they created a lot more in the second-half and scored some cracking goals, mostly by having the temerity (ok, confidence) to actually run at Coventry defenders and shoot at goal. Using this slightly unsporting tactic, they went on to slip 6 past the hapless Sky Blues, although we did get one neat score ourselves.

But given my slim to zero hopes beforehand, it was actually a fine entertaining game to watch, at least in the second half. The Emirates is a lovely stadium to watch a game in - good sightlines and comfy seats. It is all possible if you start with the aim of treating fans well, as opposed to providing the worst you can get away with. The Emirates is a big notch above the new stadia that have sprung up in the last 20 years.


Great view from our seats at the Emirates


A rather half-hearted "streaker" being led away - not a full monty


On top of that, I went with a couple of my work colleagues, and enjoyed a couple of pints beforehand and a couple after. Most enjoyable. Above all, football  is a social game. Much more important to see a game with mates than say a concert or a play. Not least as you can chat away while watching, which is rather discouraged in the theatre!

Monday 24 September 2012

Saturday in the City and Hal Cruttenden

Just because I work in the City doesn't mean I get to see inside it that much. But on Open House weekend one can. And on a fine sunny autumn day its nice just to wander around the place without the hustle and bustle of a working day.

So, for example here is the centre of the Barbican.


Smithfield Market is of course still a working meat market, but a rather elegant Victorian building too.






St John's Gate has had a chequered history. Built in 1504 as an entrance to the Priory of the Knights of St John, it has outlasted most of the rest of the monastery, although the church is nearby. It was once the home of the painter William Hogarth, and reached its highpoint in the 18th and 19th centuries when it became a tavern. It got heavily restored after its spell as a City boozer, and is now the Headquarters of the St John's Ambulance Brigade.




In addition to the little museum downstairs we were allowed up into the galleries and meeting rooms above. Very impressive.











Then nearby is the Priory Church, with its rather odd combination of Georgian facde and gothic rear. The cloister garden is really lovely.









The church itself is bright and large and contains various bits of St John's ambulance memorabilia.


A trophy for competitive first-aiding. Another Olympic sport at  which Team GB could excel?

A stretcher on wheels

But the crypt is the real delight, and quite spooky. Would make a great setting for some horror film about devil worship.



Not a well man





Then onto the Old Sessions House in Clerkenwell Green. This was at one time the busiest court in the country, having a good local criminal population from which to drum up business (Oliver Twist was set in the area). The entrance and staircase are very grand indeed. Sadly, all the other rooms, although having promising names, have no character at all now and are just set up for conferences and parties. The Dungeon Bar for example, is far more bar than dungeon.








The dungeon bar


Just round the corner is Marx's Library. Pretty from the outside it is disappointingly very much a socialist library inside. Lots of clutter and vast piles of claptrap. Every copy of the Morning Star for example, and lots of other socialist magazines which only survived for a copy or two before they either ran out of money or split up due to doctrinal differences. Lenin once had an office here, see below, which is listed.


Lenin's office


After a tour of the library, I needed lunch and a pint or two. Clerkenwell Green is very well set up for that sort of thing. I especially recommend the Cornish Cider on a warm afternoon.



Suitably fortified, I headed back into the City. St Lawrence Jewry is a rather nice church, although a bit overwhelmed by larger modern office blocks. Attractive interior though. Would make a great sandwich bar.




Next door is the Guildhall. One of the real treasures of the City. Everything from the medieval hall, some dodgy modern additions, a very fine art collection, and on top of all that (or rather on the bottom) the remains of London's Roman Amphitheatre, extremely well displayed (given the lack of any significant structure - the Coliseum it ain't).




Trying to be contemporary - bronze of a City gent with mobile. But bloody big mobile by "modern" standards..
































For some reason, the amphitheatre space also includes the City's copy of the Magna Carta. This isn't one of the original 1215 copies (of which there are only 4 extant). Bet you didn't know that there is more than one version, and the original 1215 version signed by King John only had a brief existence? Wily old King John soon saw to its demise by a bit of trickery. Luckily, he had a willing accomplice in reversing the civil liberties he had just granted. Now who could you find willing to destroy anything that looked like the start of human rights? Of course - the Pope, who else? So Good King John simply surrendered the kingdom to the papacy and Pope Innocent III released him from his oath and declared the document null and void for ever. Well has a pope ever been on the side of good? So far a pretty unblemished record of abuse down all the ages, but you never know, at some point in the distant future... Nah, not likely is it?

So, basically the schoolboy trick of making a promise with your fingers crossed behind your back. Not very sophisticted in the 13th century. However, trickery only gets you so far, and having been forced to sign up once, he and later kings got forced to sign up to similar commitments later, including Edward I who signed up to this 1297 version, which was also confirmed in Parliament. As a lawyer, its interesting to see how much shorter the Magna Carta is than say, various Pensions (Miscellaneous Amendment) Regulations. But then without a word processor you had to go easy on quill and parchment.



I did some meanderings around City Buildings, old and new,















before hitting the Thames and the City of London School. Now one has to say this is a well designed school building for an awkward site, but sadly it lacks any character, as modern school buildings tend to do. Mind you, having a playground over which St Paul's peeps, some Roman building foundations in one corner, and views across the Thames at the front from the wide balconies, probably make up for it.



Then onto the Unilever Buliding, imposing Art Deco form on the outside, modern office block inside.
















Well that was just about enough for one day, well afternoon anyway. I headed home, grabbed some dinner, got changed and headed back into town to see Hall Cruttenden at the Soho Theatre. You almost certainly won't have heard of Hal, but trust me, you ought to have done. A very funny comedian, who made a trip into the seedy netherworld of Soho on a Saturday night well worthwhile.



A sample on childcare - talking to his kids. "Don't talk to strangers, love. But don't be too scared of them either. After all statistically, as an adult living under the same roof, I am ten times more likely to harm you than a stranger. NOW WILL YOU GO TO BED?!"

Or, on  the day John Terry decides to quit international duties, his musings on why only nice players, like Muamba, seem to end up with life-threatening conditions. "His heart actually stopped on the pitch, but the St John's ambulance men got to him in time. They probably wouldn't have bothered with Terry. "Its ok, give him 5 minutes he will probably run it off.""

He has the great stage persona of being straight (married with kids) but at the same time a slightly camp luvvie  - think John Sessions. "Did four years at RADA which is the worst training in the world for what you actually then do, chasing a two-line part as an accident victim in the Bill. "Ah, I suppose I should play him a bit like Iago.."